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Why is your wardrobe chock-full of black? How do you go to bat for yourself when you’re seeking recognition at work? Learning about your unique astrological picture—aka your birth (or natal) chart—is an amazing way to advance your self-awareness. It can also come in handy when you’re trying to better understand a potential partner or significant other.
For instance, learning your date’s moon sign could offer you insight into how they process emotions and tap into their intuition, how they nurture and want to be nurtured, and what makes them feel most secure. If you know their Venus sign, you can get a read on how they relate to others, perceive beauty, and experience pleasure. Their Mercury sign could be useful for wrapping your head around how they connect romantically because someone’s natal Mercury can signal how they think and communicate.
All of that said, even if you only know a person’s sun sign—that is, the sign that the sun was moving through when they were born—you can still get a sense of their love language. That’s because the sun speaks to someone’s self-image, core identity, confidence, and purpose, all of which come into play when someone’s expressing what’s in their heart.
As you check out each sign’s love language, be sure to read your own and your partner’s sun, moon, and Venus signs. (If you don’t know them, you can find out by casting a free wheel-style birth chart by inputting your birth date, time, and place.)
Aries
Mars is the planet of energy. If you were born with your sun or other placements in the cardinal fire sign Aries, you express how you feel by taking action in a speedy, even impulsive way. For instance, after swiping right and matching, you want to spend as little time chatting before making plans to meet up. As the first sign of the zodiac, Ram people possess a wide-eyed, playful, childlike innocence, too, so you probably adore cracking your date up with goofy, slapstick humor or introducing them to a game you’ve loved since you were a kid. You’ll also show you care by making plans that are physical or active, like going for a twilight run or seeing your favorite team take on their main rival. And when it comes to sharing what’s in your heart, you’ll generally keep it straightforward, direct, and to the point.
Taurus
The must-know about your love language is that you take your sweet time as the deliberate, sensual, grounded, slow, and steady fixed earth sign ruled by Venus, the planet of pleasure and beauty. You might be happiest moving at a glacial pace to share how you feel or define the relationship, but this is only because once you’re on board, you’re fully committed. Once that happens, you’ll reveal your inner homebody, snuggling up with a luxuriously soft blanket, indulging in sumptuous comfort foods, and spending hours making out. And when you’re not couch-locked, you’ll introduce your someone special to your favorite nature spot, which helps you feel grounded and peaceful. You’re also likely to gift the object of your affection gorgeous bouquets, plants, clothes, skincare, or other tangible goods, given that the sign of the bull is associated with the Second House of Material Possessions.
Gemini
The mutable air sign Gemini is ruled by messenger Mercury, the planet of communication. So if you have your sun or other placements in the sign of the Twins, you generally show you care through lively conversation, nonstop texts, wordplay and witticisms, and of course, sending—or maybe even creating—flirty memes. Basically, your love language is language, communication, and finding shiny new ways to get stimulated mentally, perhaps through learning or travel. For instance, the ideal date night would involve flitting from one hot spot, museum, or film screening to the next, mixing and mingling with new and old friends alike. And when you’re established in a long-term relationship, you love to bond with your S.O. by jet setting or road-tripping. Mercury’s influence also tends to make you quite auditory, so you love listening to the sound of a partner’s voice as well as connecting through sexy voice texts and late-night FaceTimes.
Cancer
Born with your sun or other placements in Cancer, the cardinal water sign ruled by the emotional moon, you’re sentimental, sensitive, intuitive, and emotionally intelligent, not to mention hilarious. You’ll show your affection for a potential partner or S.O. by taking a lot of pride in getting them to burst out into gut-busting laughter. You might also hold onto heartfelt mementos (like a ticket stub or photo-booth strip) and present them to someone you care about in a thoughtful way, like with a scrapbook for your first anniversary. Because you’re so family-oriented, you also express your affection by bringing your someone special into the fold by inviting them to spend time with loved ones. And given that the moon oversees how we nurture, you adore taking care of a partner (think: whipping up a delicious meal after a long day at work).
Leo
The fixed fire sign Leo is ruled by the confident sun. So when you have your sun or other placements in the sign of the Lion, you’re effusive, charming, charismatic, loyal, theatrical, and adore showering a potential partner (or your long-term love) with luxe gifts. Words of affirmation are a biggie for you—you can’t get enough of being told you look gorgeous—so you’ll dole out similar compliments to the people you care the most about. You’re also quite action-oriented and boldly take the initiative when you know what you want, so you’ll make grand plans for a date night like a fancy meal at that new restaurant in town where it's usually impossible to get a reservation. The more cinematic and high-end an experience, the better, as far as you’re concerned. And because Leo is associated with the Fifth House of Romance and Self-Expression, you’re eager to engage with someone you care about through playfulness, creativity, and lighthearted flirtation—anything that gives you butterflies in those early dating days.
Virgo
Born with your sun or other placements in the mutable earth sign Virgo, ruled by the messenger planet, Mercury, you’re cerebral, thoughtful, sensitive, service-oriented, and analytical. You show affection by finding ways to be helpful to someone you’re head-over-heels for, generally by gathering information. That might be advice on the best takeout spots because they just moved to town, or an inside scoop on a hot new fitness class. And speaking of fitness, because the sign of the Maiden is associated with the Sixth House of Wellness, you’re a fan of supporting a loved one’s health and well-being, maybe by researching easy meals they can take to work or encouraging your sweetheart to go for morning walks with you. Basically, heartfelt gestures that make everyday life just a little bit less stressful are your forte. And as a Mercury-ruled person, you also lean on language itself to share what’s in your heart, sending well-thought-out texts or emails.
Libra
You like to set the stage for old-fashioned, elegant romance if you were born with your sun or other placements in the cardinal air sign Libra, ruled by relationship-oriented Venus. You love giving or receiving gorgeous flowers, sitting down for an upscale dining experience, visiting a fine art exhibit, and getting dressed up in an eye-catching ensemble. You excel at infusing life with more balance and beauty while dodging conflict. As an air sign, you’re social and like to connect with people on a cerebral level and get out into the world. Because Libra is associated with the Seventh House of Partnership, you feel most fulfilled by bonding with someone special one-on-one, carving out time in which you can connect just the two of you—ideally within a beautiful space. You might also want to bring a date to a gorgeous, Instagram-worthy location, like a hidden botanical garden, or invite them along to a trendy, see-and-be-seen hangout with a group of friends.
Scorpio
Prioritizing deep, intimate bonding time and sexual self-expression is your love language if you were born with the sun or other placements in the fixed water sign Scorpio, co-ruled by go-getter Mars and transformative Pluto. Surface-level conversations only get under your skin, as you’d prefer to uncover who a potential partner or S.O. truly is—spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. And given the Mars rulership, you’re laser-focused on fostering a connection once you’re invested, so you’ll rarely beat around the bush about what you want. You are, however, innately quite private, so a potential partner or significant other will know you’re serious when you divulge your hidden truths. And because Scorpio is associated with the Eighth House of Intimacy and Emotional Bonds, which also oversees sex, feeling as though you can express yourself through physical touch is typically a must for you, even if that’s just initially a sensual massage or intense make-out session.
Sagittarius
Because the mutable fire sign is ruled by abundance-bringing Jupiter, you’re bold, jovial, full of wanderlust, unfiltered, philosophical, and truly entertaining. You tend to have the perspective that going bigger is always better, so you’re extremely effusive and buoyant when interacting with someone you care about, and you’re no stranger to making grand plans for date nights or weekend getaways. In fact, the sign of the Archer is associated with the Ninth House of Adventure and Higher Learning, and globetrotting is one of your most heartfelt aspirations. You enjoy pursuing eye-opening, thrilling, educational experiences that involve getting out of your comfort zone with a potential partner or S.O. It might be a day at a local amusement park riding your favorite roller coasters or taking a class to learn a different language. And when it comes to opening up about your feelings, you tell it like it is. You'll share both the positive and the negative of your emotions, your perspective, and your opinions, given that Sag prizes what they see as the truth above all else.
Capricorn
Born with your sun or other placements in the cardinal earth sign Capricorn, ruled by Saturn — the planet of hard work and commitment—you’re pragmatic, goal-oriented, grounded, and a bit of an old soul in how you express yourself emotionally. You might very well gravitate to old-fashioned romantic gestures, like planning a traditional date night (maybe an elegant dinner out ahead of a classic film screening) or treating your S.O. to a box of fine chocolates. Capricorn is associated with the Tenth House of Career, which speaks to just how industrious and focused you are on achieving whatever it is you set out to do in a practical, step-by-step way. It’s in this same way that you’re happy to take your time laying a solid foundation for any relationship, and you’ll think about how you and a potential partner match up when it comes to your individual work ethics and aspirations. You’ll champion their dreams by helping them get organized and think about what they want to accomplish in the long run.
Aquarius
The fixed air sign, Aquarius, is co-ruled by electrifying, rebellious Uranus and taskmaster Saturn. You're unconventional, innovative, science-minded, and even a bit contrarian. You share how you feel by showing a potential partner or significant other your quirky side. You might detail the out-there invention concept that you’ve been batting around, or invite them to join you at a fan event for an esoteric TV show or film franchise. And because the sign of the Water Bearer is associated with the Eleventh House of Networking and Groups, you’re big on platonic bonds, community, and being a part of a team. So you’re also all for connecting with someone special by spending quality time on group dates, casual get-togethers with your social circle, and even volunteer projects with a local nonprofit. As a deeply humanitarian air sign, you’ll show up for your nearest and dearest by channeling your cerebral energy into an undertaking that will make life a bit more vibrant for them—and, ideally, others in your community—like recycling or canvassing together for an upcoming election.
Pisces
Ruled by spiritual Neptune and lucky Jupiter, the mutable water sign Pisces is best known for being empathic, imaginative, mystical, psychic, idealistic, and profoundly emotional. And if you were born with your sun or other placements in the sign of the Fish, you’re apt to show you care by wearing your heart on your sleeve and truly committing yourself mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to the person you adore. Compassionate and eager to heal others, you tend to feel what a potential partner or S.O. feels alongside them. And as a poet at heart, you might also write flowery love letters and send deeply feeling texts. You also enjoy disappearing down escapist rabbit holes with your someone special, whether you’re listening to music and trading notes on the most romantic lyrics or going on a whimsical getaway together. And thanks to Neptune, you tend to wear rose-colored glasses, idealizing your partner and your relationship. That could prove downright dreamy—or challenging when those reality checks arise.